Supporting Children Through Family Changes: Divorce, Moving, And Other Stressors

Together, caregivers and schools can create a robust framework to help children thrive despite life’s uncertainties.


Significant life changes on the homefront, such as a legal separation, relocation, or other critical life transitions, can profoundly impact a child’s emotional and mental well-being. While some of these changes are inevitable, how adults handle them is pivotal in how children process and adapt. Children can navigate these challenges with proper support, building resilience and emotional strength to face life’s uncertainties.

• Children thrive on stability, and when that foundation shifts, whether due to parental separation, moving to a new home, or other upheavals, it can evoke feelings of fear, confusion, and insecurity. These changes, while older ones, might grapple with anger or a sense of betrayal. In many cases, the absence of clear communication compounds these emotions, leaving children feeling isolated and vulnerable.
• Recognizing these emotional undercurrents is the first step toward providing adequate support. Each child’s processes change differently; some express their emotions openly, while others may withdraw or exhibit changes in behaviour, such as difficulty sleeping or declining academic performance. Acknowledging and understanding these varied responses enables caregivers to respond with sensitivity and care.
• Open and honest communication is the cornerstone of helping children through family changes. Providing age-appropriate explanations about what is happening and what they can expect moving forward can ease confusion and alleviate fear. Importantly, avoiding unnecessary details or assigning blame helps minimise additional stress and ensures the focus remains on the child’s wellbeing.
• For instance, in the case of divorce, reassuring children that the separation is vital. Similarly, when preparing for a move, involving children in the process, such as letting them choose their room or explore the new neighbourhood, can instil a sense of agency and ease the transition. These small but meaningful gestures can help children feel secure amidst uncertainty.
• Listening actively to children is equally crucial. Expressing emotions without judgment builds trust and emotional safety. Statements like, “It’s okay to feel sad about leaving your friends,” or “I understand why this change feels overwhelming,” can provide immense comfort, letting children know their feelings are seen and valued.
• While these changes may disrupt routines, maintaining familiar structures and introducing new ones can help children regain a sense of normalcy. Simple routines like family meals, bedtime rituals, or weekend activities anchor the chaos, providing much-needed stability. Keeping children connected to their support systems, teachers, friends, and extended family can further reassure them that they are not alone.

Transitions, while challenging, also present opportunities to teach valuable life skills such as adaptability and emotional regulation.